I don’t like limitations. I don’t like them placed upon me. Not by others and most certainly not by myself. If it takes limitation to alter something then in my eyes I simply just am not ready for or willing to change in that area.
To me limitations is what we seek when we lack the self-discipline to choose not to have something. It is easier to make something forbidden and “bad” than to take responsibility for having it available without exploiting it. Moderation takes discipline and awareness… and in the tug-o-war between guilty pleasures and a guilty conscience … it just adds a kind of pressure that I neither need or want to have to deal with.
Denial tactics tempt me to break promises I have made to myself. They challenge my determination in an unproductive manner because it becomes an issue of “losing out” vs. “being responsible”. There is no winning a situation like that… and let’s face it… we all like to feel like we’re winning and coming out on top. Like we can have whatever we want whenever we want, and we’re not going to like anyone trying to take that away from us.
In human psychology and child rearing the classical example of denial tactics and their piss poor influence is when overprotective parents at pretty much all cost try to keep children away from what they consider “bad” for them. If that approach worked there’d be literally no under-age smokers and no minors having sex or drinking. The intentions are sound and admirable, yet glorifying something through denial is the least responsible way of dealing with what is now sure to become a problem. It is enforcing a limitation upon someone else. And no matter how well-intended it may be… how many of us accept it when others do that to us?
And then it suddenly isn’t about the object of contention… but instead a power struggle between the involved parties. It becomes about proving a point and proclamations of personal freedom vs. responsibility. I don’t know if a battle like that could ever be truly won. Settled in a stalemate, sure… but won? I don’t think so…
So, rather than try to achieve the aim I have set for myself of overcoming the Insignificant Five by limiting myself, I am slowly trying to do it by establishing different routines and choices for myself. No schedules. No diet plans. None of the “you can’t eat that” or “you haven’t done that so you can’t have this today”… screw that. Just different choices. This isn’t a bargaining procedure to force the “price” of success down to some tolerable level. I will not live like that.
Success isn’t a sacrifice. It’s a goal. It isn’t about losing out in favour of gaining some sought after prize. It’s about enriching life on a broader scale. And if anything is given up or left behind in the process then let it be because it isn’t wanted or needed anymore. Not because I can’t have both.
I’d much rather learn to choose the right things and enjoy that than attempt to obliterate the existence of some of my choices simply so I won’t be tempted.
That’s just my preference… and it is working. The scale and the mirror both say so…